The Semester in Review
In case you have let all the memories of the past semester slip out of your head while packing it with information for finals, or you are suffering from Post-Traumatic-Stress-Disorder-induced amnesia because of finals, here is a wrap-up of our fall semester. August
Move in day was a rush for all. Upperclassmen smile to parents and rave about how awesome Ludlow is, until the parents go back to their hotels. Then they assure freshmen that the King’s lease ends this year and it really, truly, isn’t as much of a prison as it seems. Meanwhile, those in Midtown fought for the freight elevators and almost half of those living at Clark St. did nothing but watch their flat-screens all weekend.
Convocation is spiced up when Reagan’s president calls his house “the most bad-ass” and then Lewis’s president uses the Bible to make fun of him. Classic.
The Great Race confused 70% of the students, most of whom were incoming students who had never seen a map of Manhattan and frustrated the other 30%, mostly upperclassmen. (One was reportedly seen screaming at his team, “No, the flashing hand does not mean stop!!”)
During Ludlow’s orientation, Nick Swedick handed copies of the Geneva Conviction with underlined paragraphs and notes highlighting how Ludlow doesn’t violate any of its terms.
On Aug. 27, Mayor Bloomberg informs NYC of Hurricane Irene: “When you wake up in the morning, please, stay inside.” Interpreting this as, “If you wake up,” a mixture of panic and over-the-top preparation ensues. The girls in the Herald Towers and Vogue also panicked - not because of the natural disaster, but because the entire population of Ludlow was coming to stay with them, despite specific off-limit hours of visit that had been emailed out by the Dean of Students no less than eight days earlier.
The Drama Competition proves to be full of wit, Kingsian jokes, Connecticut Yankee parades and cross-dressing Churchillians (the event itself managing to draw out the silliest of King’s nomenclature).
The tenth anniversary of 9/11 draws terror threats. Thankfully nothing happens and thousands are safe during the memorials. But this somber day did not stop born-and-raised New Yorkers from getting frustrated with slow-moving tourists.
Students left the city for two separate Fall Retreats – one about sheltering your community and one about never opening up until you’re ready for marriage. Half the school came back ready to love each other, and the other came back determined to never talk to the opposite sex again.
The Occupy Wall Street movement starts while King’s students are away at their retreats. Consequently, the more confrontational students can only fervently debate the issues raised with people who already agree with them.
Spirit Week provides opportunities to dress as superheroes, cowboys and story book classics. However, there were more Peter Parkers than Spidermen when the student body realized that there was no dress code for the week. President D'Souza loses to Freshman John Sailer in the chess tournament, leading Sailer to remark, “Like a boss,” drop the mic, throw his arms in the air and walk away.
The awkwardness of Dinesh’s loss is nothing in contrast to the King’s Sock Hop the next night, which only got more awkward as the swing dancing stopped and the “normal” dancing started.
On Oct. 4, half of the school starts reading The Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court. Five minutes later the same half puts the book down and starts to read Sparknotes. The next day so many students fail the test (announced two months beforehand), that it gets a ten point curve.
Steve Jobs dies. Professor Brenberg aptly works this into an Economics lesson the very next day.
Fall Break allows students to sleep for three days straight.
Midterms force students to stay up for three days straight.
The King’s Baseball team wins their first game ever, a most mighty feat, unless you count Slounge pool games.
The month closes out with the first Inviso Weekend of the year. Many Kingsians come to the Ice Cream Social. Mostly just for the ice cream and not to be social. “It’ll be a good year, wink wink,” said the freshmen of Reagan, saying “wink wink” out loud.
The first snow of the season causes premature Christmas cheer, much to the dismay of students from the warmer, Southern states.
The House of Margaret Thatcher is victorious in the women's basketball tourney, upsetting The House of Queen Elizabeth I's previous reign of the court. Reagan surprises the school with a team that is actually good and goes undefeated to beat Churchill in overtime. (Previously Reagan had frequently failed, even though only four teams compete.) A lowlight of the tournament: SBA vs. Barton game, where the score was 0-0 at halftime. Luke Smith, King’s soccer coach, notes, “Cheerio, my good chap - by the Queen, if that isn’t a jiffy of a high-scoring match of footie!”
Professor Minkoff and the King’s Theater Group rewrite and perform The Good Person of Szechwan. Much like our generation’s relationship with The Italian Job, most King’s students weren’t able to compare the remake to the original that they hadn’t seen.
The Houses of Truth and ten Boom co-host a potluck for Thanksgiving Day. Many feasted in the Slounge as freshmen who were too curious for their own good got swept up in the rush of millions of tourists in Herald Square. Luckily, nobody was injured on Black Friday, perhaps a result of Celina Durgin's excellent safety article in the Empire State Tribune.
The Interregnum Film Competition draws so much opposition that the school counts attendance as 10% of the score to stop students from protesting or falling to apathy. “It was cool, I guess,” one student said after the night. Many still did not attend, for 10% of one Interregnum section hardly adds up to any overall points. This calculation surprised the higher-ups at King’s who despite their new math classes last year, still privately doubted the students could do math if a supply/demand chart was not involved. The House of Queen Elizabeth I won first place.
The Houses of Lewis and Thatcher host the Red and Green Affair, which seems more like an International Ventures party than a Christmas affair.
The last day of classes is Dec. 7. Then a week of finals, which is nothing to joke about. And then ...